Easeful with cancer
One of my dear mentors introduced me to the word. A mix of peaceful and easy, easeful feels like the antithesis of the cancer journey.
The cancer story is often that of the warrior who is fighting for this life. For most of my experience I didn't feel like a warrior. I felt like I had lost control over the fundamentals of my life. I didnt have control over how I would feel 10 minutes from now, or what the schedule of testing would be, or what the results of the latest biopsy would bring. During those moments all I craved was a little bit of lightness.
Could I get through the next 10 minutes without having to answer how long I had? Could I live for the next 10 minutes without this pain? Could I live the next 10 minutes without thinking about calling the insurance company or making that appointment ? Could I live without the worry or angst? Could I live in peace? Could I let this journey feel easy? Could it be easful?